Where Empathy Comes From and Why We’re Losing It

Empathy did not emerge as a leadership concept or workplace trend. It evolved as a survival skill. Long before modern organisations existed, our ability to understand one another determined whether we could cooperate, protect ourselves, and thrive together. I believe that understanding where empathy comes from is essential if we are to understand why it feels increasingly absent in today’s workplaces.

From an evolutionary perspective, empathy allowed early human groups to function as communities rather than collections of individuals. Being able to read emotion, anticipate need, and respond to others was not optional. It was foundational to survival. This wiring remains deeply embedded in our nervous systems today, shaping how we relate to one another at work whether we acknowledge it or not.

So why does empathy feel harder to access now?

One reason is speed. Modern work environments reward urgency, efficiency, and constant availability. As pressure increases, people default to task completion over connection. When time feels scarce, listening is often the first behaviour to disappear, even though it is one of the most important. Over time, this creates distance, misunderstanding, and disconnection.

Another factor is scale. Many organisations have grown rapidly, operating across geographies, cultures, and time zones. While this creates opportunity, it can also dilute human connection if leaders are not equipped to bridge difference with empathy. Without deliberate effort, complexity becomes a barrier to understanding rather than an invitation to listen more closely.

Technology also plays a role. While digital tools enable collaboration, they can reduce the richness of communication when relied upon exclusively. Tone, context, and emotional nuance are easily lost, increasing the likelihood of misinterpretation. When communication becomes transactional, empathy quietly erodes.

I have seen that when empathy declines, workplaces often respond by adding more structure, more process, and more control. Unfortunately, these responses rarely restore connection. In fact, they can deepen the Empathy Deficit by further distancing leaders from the lived reality of their teams.

Neuroscience helps explain why this matters. Human beings are wired to connect face to face, to read micro expressions, and to respond to emotional cues. When these signals are absent or ignored, the nervous system interprets uncertainty as threat. This shifts behaviour towards self protection rather than collaboration, reducing trust and engagement.

The loss of empathy is not inevitable, but it is cumulative. Small moments of not listening, rushing conversations, or dismissing perspective add up over time. Eventually, people stop offering insight altogether. This is often misread as apathy, when in reality it is self preservation.

The good news is that empathy can be reactivated. Because empathy is a skill rather than a fixed trait, it can be strengthened through conscious leadership behaviour. Listening, curiosity, and presence are not soft additions to work. They are the mechanisms through which connection is restored.

I believe that leaders who understand the origins of empathy are better equipped to protect it. By recognising the conditions that erode empathy, organisations can redesign how leaders communicate, meet, and make decisions. This is not about slowing down progress, but about sustaining it.

Empathy is not disappearing because people no longer care but because the environments we have created make it harder to access. High stress and low time. Rebuilding empathy at work begins with intentionally recognising its power as a skillset, and then committing to leadership practices that allow it to surface again. Will you begin practising today? (And remember, everyone is leading someone!)

About Mimi Nicklin:
Mimi Nicklin is a globally recognised keynote speaker, bestselling author, and Founder of Empathy Everywhere, working with organisations worldwide through leadership development, training, keynotes, masterclasses, and webinars. Recognised as the #1 Workplace Wellbeing leader, Mimi has reached over four million people globally through her work in empathetic leadership, listening, and Listening-Led Leadership, helping organisations strengthen employee engagement, workplace culture, and performance in complex, AI driven environments. Her work reframes empathy as a critical leadership capability grounded in neuroscience and applied through practical empathy training and organisational development. With a mission to reconnect one million people by 2028, Mimi Nicklin is emerging as one of the defining human leadership voices of this decade. Find out more via www.empathyeverywhere.co or [email protected]